Archive for October, 2012

Is It March Yet?

HI!!!  I’m alive!  A little worse for the wear, but I’m alive!  And as an answer to my prayers, so is the baby in my belly!  We are 18 weeks 3 days now and I had my anatomy scan (GASP) on Monday…showing a perfectly HEALTHY little girl!!  Did I mention HEALTHY?  HEALTHY HEALTHY HEALTHY!!!  Oh and she had 3 little white lines between her legs…hehe.  I’m over the freaking moon!  (Gee, can you tell with the 500 exclamation points I’ve used already?)  I’m not going to dig deep for this one because I already did on Tyler’s site, but I just wanted to pop in and show some love to the bloggers I follow.  It seems like a couple of them have been on a small blogging hiatus, as well.  One, due to finding her peace and happy place again (why is it so hard to lose sight of that?) and the other because I think she was moving!  She always posts pictures of her food and I absolutely love looking at other peoples food…don’t judge me.  Speaking of food, I’ve been eating like a cow lately but gaining in a healthy way for pregnancy, so I won’t complain.  I think I’m up a total of 5 lbs since the beginning, which is probably good since I started below “normal” (for me).

Anyway, quick update from the last time I posted (which was back in like 1999…or 3 weeks ago…):

~  I haven’t started walking yet…lame, I know.  I’m totally in that “I have so much to do that I’m overwhelmed by it all so I’ll just sit here and do none of it” mode and I’m slowly working my way out of it.  Slowly.  Turns out, a lot of anxiety was alleviated by the anatomy scan, though.  Win/Win!
~  We are out of “miscarriage” territory…but have entered “stillborn” territory.  Lose/Lose, eh?
~  Feeling the baby move more regularly has been one of the best things for my heart (and mind).  I can’t wait for the husby to feel her kicking.
~  By the way, her name is Kimber Elise.  Kimber after my grandpa-in-law’s (hubs’ paternal grandpa) only daughter, Kimberly, who was stillborn at full term.  We know that pain of losing a baby and we don’t want her memory to fade.  Luckily, we also love the name Kimber.  It was kind of an unspoken agreement when Hubs asked about naming a girl that.  His grandpa means a lot to us and has been there for my husband through a lot.  We have a special, although sucky, bond with him now that we’ve lost a baby, too.  He was the only one in either of our families who really understood what we were going through.  Makes me tear up to think about.
~  Even though I’m determined to ENJOY this pregnancy, since it will hopefully be my last, I just can’t wait for March when she is here, safe and healthy.  I’m very excited for my KB to have a little sister.  Even though her big brother isn’t here on earth to protect her, I believe he has her back from above.
~  There’s a bucket of Halloween candy sitting in front of me and the skittles are whispering sweet nothings my way.  Bastards.

HAPPY HALLOWEEN!

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Relief

Appointment went great! We couldn’t get an exact heart rate because baby was so squirmy (that’s a good thing!) but we did get to hear it for a few seconds, which is reassuring. I was worried that my dr. wouldn’t let me do the anatomy scan (the one where we found out about Tyler’s condition) as soon as I am able to but she was awesome about it. She said that it didn’t matter to her (she isn’t the one doing the scan, it will be an ultrasound tech). So I will get the scan at 18 weeks 1 day which is only 3 weeks away! Luckily, since my dr. doesn’t even have to be there, I can get it done the day before hubby’s birthday. My brain is getting all jumbled…I’m so relieved and happy. This is so freaking stressful! I know it all comes down to control. I had so much control before getting pregnant. Before Tyler’s diagnosis. Control is such an illusion and damnit, I KNOW that but running and losing weight gave me that false sense of control all over again. I haven’t been exercising regularly and I known it’s a problem, I can feel it. I need to start walking regularly again. I need that exercise to fight off the negativity, the anxiety, doubt, anger, fear. I’ve been missing it.

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The Moment of Truth

Ok I just need to unload a little. Tomorrow is another prenatal appointment and, like usual, I’m starting to freak a little. I’m showing, I felt the baby move for the first time last week…shit’s getting real and that means that if something bad happens, it won’t be easy. Not that any baby loss is easy but miscarrying was a hell of a lot easier to move on from than losing Tyler was. I’m only 15 weeks but if I started to miscarry, oh well. Dr.’s won’t do anything to stop it until the baby is viable. Which isn’t for another 9 weeks. If there is no heartbeat tomorrow, I will eventually go into labor and give birth to a baby (it’s about the size of a lemon right now). I “passed tissue” last time. Ugh.

I hate being so nervous.

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Let’s Talk Laundry

Hey folks! I haven’t posted in awhile and I don’t have a legit excuse. Except laziness, but that doesn’t count as “legit”. Meh.

To spare my FB news feed, I thought I’d post my rant/review here on…dun dun dun…MY LAUNDRY! We had a new washer and dryer delivered today and I’m really excited about it! It was a nice surprise before 11am, as we were told it would be here by TOMORROW. Let me explain why this is so exciting to me.

*…flashback time…*

Back in the fall of 2006, the husbee and I bought our first home together and our first washer/dryer set. Upon realizing the vast array of options available, we didn’t know where to start. Hubs happened upon a tiny local appliance store and was directed to a Speed Queen set. “What the hell is Speed Queen?” I asked later, skeptical of this “local” store. Apparently, this brand is used by any and all laundromats. These machines are used and abused for YEARS before being retired and still manage to get clothes clean, even in their old age. These machines all have the same guts but are available with different options (adjustable signal, automatic extra rinse, etc). Like buying a base model car vs. heated seats, leather, sun roof. I was still a bit skeptical, but the hubs got a good deal and with a track record like that, I’d give it a go. Holy amazingness. BEST.MACHINES.EVER. I was never disappointed by these machines. They were fast, got my clothes clean and got nearly all the dog hair out of my blankets, sheets, etc. But…and there’s always a but…I didn’t know what I had until it was gone.

*…fast forward 5 years…*

3 days before Baby Bear was born, husbee got a job offer we couldn’t refuse, starting in 4 weeks. 10 days after listing our house, we were in degotiation. We ended up selling our washer and dryer with the house (which is pretty standard). Unfortunately, the crazies we bought our current home from absolutely refused to leave their set, so we were forced to buy. I was swept up in the “pretty front-loader” hype and the previous owners had built a pedestal for theirs so it seemed logical to get one, too. We were living out of a hotel (that was equipped with a SQ washer and dryer on the second level, I might add) for 2.5 weeks, the munchkin was about 8 weeks old and we knew NOBODY. We NEEDED a washer and dryer by the time we finally got into the house and didn’t have a whole lot of time to shop (hubs working 10-12 hour days). We bought a Maytag 4000 Series set. It was clean white, silver buttons, lots of options, high efficiency, blah, blah, freaking blah. Within a month, we had to have a technician come out to figure out why the hell the washer nearly shook the entire house when it hit the spin cycle. “Out of balance” he tells us. Within a month? Ok, whatever. It continued to be kind of loud but we ignored it. I was not a fan from the beginning. Water pools at the front of the rubber seal and has to be wiped out after every load, dog hair and baby socks got stuck between the drum and the rubber seal, clothes would fall on the floor every time I tried to pull them out to switch them to the dryer, the lint trap barely ever had any lint/dog hair in it (gee, that makes you feel like you’re putting clean clothes on when you know HAIR is still stuck to everything). Of course, I was comparing it to my SQ set, the set I’d been using for the last 5 years.

*…fast forward 16 months later…*

About a week ago, hubs and I noticed how loud the washer had gotten. We’re talking jet engine loud. Can’t-hear-the-tv-over-the-noise (laundry room is down the hall and door closed) loud. Could-hear-it-from-the-road loud. When-friends-were-over-they-asked-what-the-hell-that-noise-is loud. Hubs took this past week off to accommodate his parents coming and decided to have a tech come out to check it out. It happened to be the same guy who came last year. Turns out, the Maytag 4000 Series washer is NOTORIOUS for a bearing breaking within the first two years. Also turns out, it’s an $800 problem. You can buy a new one for that price. What bullshit. We searched the internet a bit that night and found out that the tech wasn’t exaggerating, it’s a common problem. If we can get Maytag to send the part for free, we might be able to get it fixed and sell it on consignment. But Maytag only gives a one year warranty. We should have known that the product was junk if the company would only stand behind their product for one stinking year. We were going to need to buy a new set, or pay the same price to “fix” the one we had but would have to pay that in a year, when that part took a shit again. I didn’t care where we had to go to find a dealer, we were NOT getting anything but a SQ set. Luckily, we found a local appliance dealer that carries SQ and ended up getting the absolute cheapest, “base model” washer and dryer! These are top-loading, basic machines, people. The owner was surprised that I didn’t love the front loaders and didn’t want another set. Then told us how our brand is the machine you want if you get really dirty (um…we have 2 dogs…). Whatever, I was so happy to see that SQ symbol when we walked into that store!!! When we got home, hubs and FIL (father-in-law) tore out the tile pedestal the previous owners hastily and shabbily put together, and got the laundry room ready for my new set! After it was delivered and set up today, I did a load of my cleaning washcloths. I have 2 sets, one is colored and what I use to Swiffer my hardwood floors and the other set is all white and I use those to clean windows, mirrors and bathroom. Using the Maytag set, I’d have to wash these separately or I’d end up with dog hair and my hair all over the white cloths from the colored ones (after they were “clean” and dry). As it were, I’d have to pick hair off of the colored ones, but I was saving myself the hassle if I just did them separately. So much for “high efficiency” if I have to do 2 loads for 10 cloths, right? Just to prove my point, I put them all together in one load today and wouldn’t you know it, I didn’t pick a single hair off of ANY of these washcloths and the lint trap was FULL of my long hair and dog hair. I wanted to cry, it made me so happy. I finally feel like I have clean clothes, blankets, sheets, towels again! I had a lot more settings on my old SQ set, but I don’t give a damn. My laundry is clean again!

Moral of this too-long story….don’t you dare settle for less when you KNOW something works.

***If there are typos, I’ll fix them later but I’m on my computer and this damn thing has a tendency to delete things without my approval so I’m typing and posting quickly so that doesn’t happen!

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